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How to Stop Being Nervous on a First Date

  • Published: 2009-02-12 (Rev. 2009-09-05) - Contact: Disabled World
  • Synopsis: How to calm those nervous first date jitters and be confident in yourself when dating the opposite sex.

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If you're too worked up before a first date, then you might doom it. The key is not be so obsessed with all your insecurities, for example don't have all your thoughts consumed in what your date will think about your handicap. If they already know you're disabled, then they obviously don't find it an obstacle, so don't be so preoccupied with that. Whatever you're self-conscious about, you will simply bring negative attention to it during the date if you're obviously nervous.

If you're disabled and dating, then you're going to deal with the same kinds of anxiety as anyone else going on a first date.

Thanks to the many new disabled dating sites out there, singles are meeting new people left and right and finding it a lot more convenient and easy to find the love of their life.

This is especially true for disabled singles who otherwise, would find it difficult to meet potential mates. However, no matter how familiar you are with the online personals, that doesn't mean you're going to feel any more assured when you leave those dating chat rooms and take your relationship into the real world.

So, how do you quiet those nerves

If you're too worked up before a first date, then you might doom it. The key is not be so obsessed with all your insecurities, for example don't have all your thoughts consumed in what your date will think about your handicap. If they already know you're disabled, then they obviously don't find it an obstacle, so don't be so preoccupied with that. Whatever you're self-conscious about, you will simply bring negative attention to it during the date if you're obviously nervous. So what should you focus on instead? Your date of course!

A lot of singles concentrate on how they can best present themselves and hide all their flaws to impress their dates.

This is the wrong approach. One reason friends dating often works out, is because the two people have gotten to know each other's true selves before ever beginning a relationship. So on your first date, be yourself and nothing else. You're aim shouldn't be to try to win over someone who isn't right for you - and they are only right for you if they accept and love you for who you are. Once you realize that a first date isn't a

"win or lose" ordeal but instead merely a first test (of many) to see if you are compatible with the other person, then a lot of the pressure will be removed.

Back to focusing on the other person.

Remember when you looked over those disabled personals and you paid a great deal attention to the people who crafted them? If you want to be interesting to your date, be interested in them. No one likes to have dinner with someone who only talks about themselves. This is a chance to learn about the person who might be your next husband or wife, so don't take it lightly! Think about a first date as an exciting opportunity to get to know someone. If you have the attitude that dating is fun and unpredictable, then you will find it a lot easier to keep your cool.

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