Disability Sexuality: Dating and Chat
Sex and disability are rarely discussed in the same sentence. As a result more than 50% of disabled people do not have any form of a regular sex life. Today's, and past societies, tend to believe that persons with intellectual and/or physical disabilities should be non sexual.
Culture and Society
Culture has tended to set various rules and ideas on how people should look and act.
A person with a disability of some kind may tend to feel unattractive, or even less worthy of sexual partnership or relations, because they think that they can't live up to the idealized image today's society has set. If the disability happened later on in their life, the person may recall how they used to look and feel very unattractive by comparison to who they once were.
Due to the lack of most societies knowledge and sexual education, the disabled person's chances of meeting a potential sexual partner are greatly reduced. However if sex and disabilities was to be discussed more openly in our society today, then people would be much more educated about the topic.
Sexual ignorance is an enormous hurdle for most of us when we are trying to figure ourselves out sexually. Our situations are made a lot worse when we are denied access to the little bit of sex education most able bodied people receive. In a great deal of cases, sex education is being withheld from many persons with disabilities on the assumption that the individual 'won't need it'.
Persons who are intellectually or physically disabled, either from birth or through an accident or onset of disease later on in their life, may find it very difficult to express their own sexuality in satisfying ways.
Physical Disabilities Can Interfere with Sexual Functions
For example some males with multiple sclerosis (MS) may suffer from impotence or failure to obtain and maintain an erection.
Physical disability can most certainly prevent experimenting with many sex positions or cause problems with sexual arousal and reduce their general libido.
Some medical conditions, such as cerebral palsy (CP), can often cause uncontrollable muscle spasms or contractions, which can interfere with love making or masturbation and also cause clamping of the vagina making actual penetration impossible.
Some people with spinal cord injuries suffer reduced or lost sexual sensations in their genitals, but they may still feel the desire to have sex and feel sexual arousal.
Some forms of disabilities tend to impact a lot more in regards to a males fertility than a female, since men with some disabilities are troubled by impotence, whereas women with impairments are usually just as fertile as women without any physical disabilities or emotional disabilities.
Online Dating and Chat Sites for Persons with Disability
While many websites offer a variety of general chat rooms, and other websites provide adult chat rooms and dating services, there are far fewer focused adult oriented websites online that cover the more sexual side of relationships for persons with disabilities. here are a few we found.
Here are a few websites that cater for disability sex we found online using a Google, MSN and Yahoo search for websites offering disability adult dating and chat rooms:
- Local Online Dating Services - Includes dating websites that may not be just for people with disabilities.
- Queers On Wheels - (www.queersonwheels.com) is an organization that aides the sexual well-being of the physically disabled community, and welcomes people from all sexual identity groups, including those who identify as GLBTQ (gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, or queer ).
- Outsiders - (outsiders.org.uk) is a group to help socially and physically disabled people in their personal development. A wide range of disabled volunteers are involved in running the support network, social events, the Sex and Disability Alliance, the V-Group for disabled women with sexual problems, an LGBT network,a social group for neuro diverse people, and research projects. We campaign for disabled people to be accepted as sexual partners.
- The PeopleNet DisAbility - This website is for disabled adults wanting to learn more about love, sexuality, and relationships - and maybe find that special someone. Check out the information on dating services which do not discriminate against adults with disabilities.
- Deaf Queer Resource Center (DQRC) (www.deafqueer.org) This is the place to go for resources and information for, by and about the Deaf Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgendered communities.
- Ragged Edge - The Disability Rag (www.ragged-edge-mag.com) A very interesting website that offers thousands of articles. Visit to find out more about the site and some of their other publications.
- Sexual Health Network - People with a disability or living with an illness may wonder whether they can have children, if their partners will stay with them, if anyone will find them sexually desirable, or if they will ever enjoy sex again - www.sexualhealth.com/channel/view/disability-illness/
- Disabled World - Our own free disabled chat service from Disabled World. (Non adult)