Five poems by Flora Aguasa that relate to being blind, disability, and faith...
November 11, 2002, this was the day and year when my mom, my eldest sister and nephew died in a plane crash.
You left us with so much memories.
This one is for you mom, my simple tribute.
Words are not enough to express
How much you mean to me
You wrapped me with comfort in life,
Cuddled me with unconditional love,
Ever ready to give me a tantalising smile every morning that brightens my day...
I never felt the emptiness of you,
Because your love and care is overflowing.
You let me grew with so much love and happiness,
Not having friends, but rather, surrounded by toys
You let me knew the difference of right and wrong,
By following the commands of God.
You let me realised the meaning of acquiring this and don't have that,
And not all things are easy on this planet.
You let me knew how to inspire and move other people,
Mom, I've started it
The best is yet to come.
I owe my life to you,
From the time I came into this world,
Til my last breath.
With all the burdens, sacrifices and pains
I caused you,
I can't thanked you enough...
For being a good nanny to my kids,
Providing them ample financial support because we, as young parents really couldn't afford...
Thank you for the years that my own family doesn't have the capacity to start a new family,
Yet, you are always there for us
Ready to give an open hand.
You keep on encouraging me
To do this and do that
And not to gave up easily.
You never let me down
You cried with me,
Laughed with me,
Danced with me
and prayed with me.
Now, I knew the importance of being a mom,
Giving birth and taking care of the kids
Simply doesn't end there
A big role awaits you in the future.
I MISS YOU SO MUCH, Mommy!
I lost a mom like you but you will forever loved and missed!
Be my guardian angel,
See you in my dreams.
© Flora Aguasa
One sunny morning while I'm alone,
I kept on looking outside
And asked myself,
Is this my life forever?
As the lanky trees we're swayed by the wind,
The grasses were calm and tranquil
And the chirping of birds keep on serenading me
Thus, evoked a crying scene...
I really can't believe that my life turned out this way,
Living with disability!
No work opportunities
for me anymore,
No close family member on my side,
No friends to uplift me
I can't help it!
Did I do wrong?
Have I done something?
Most of my years, I've been living with this disability,
Dealing with pains and sufferings
I can't go out anymore by myself,
My life evolves basically at home...particularly in the bedroom for my safety.
Am I still worthy?
Tears and anger filled my helpless life now
So many questions
That until now I haven't got an answer...
My disability totally changed me, my life as a whole.
It made a great impact on me
And to my dear family as well...
WHY ME? IT'S NOT FAIR!
Dealing with pain as well as dealing with disability made me suffer more!
Is this my fate?
If yes, then, don't leave me, LORD
If no, then, show me the right way, LORD!
Because I don't know where to go,
I'm stuck on a
crossroad full of pain, anger and suffering!
© Flora Aguasa
They say that the eyes are the
window of the soul
Because they captivates the beauty of nature
But what if you are legally blind?
And couldn't see nor enjoy anymore the beauty of nature...the gift of GOD?
Then this adage is not applicable to me...
Not all sayings are true!
LIVING WITH BLINDNESS is like living without purpose
All of my dreams were shuttered
My plans were diminished
I don't know what self confidence means to me now
Because I truly don't have it anymore
Is life really unfair?
Is life full of pains and sufferings?
Is life full of trials and hardships?
Is life full of disappointment and rejection?
Is life full of chaos and unhappiness?
Life is so miserable to me...
So much of unreality,
So much pain.
My blindness controls me to achieve my goals,
It makes me useless...
The truth really hurts
Sometimes, I asked myself
Is it worth fighting for?
With deep sadness, my tears start to fall
taps me and says,
Because I, YOUR HOLY FATHER wants you to be strong,
I want you to fight!
YES, its worth fighting for
Because you have a wonderful and complete family to fight and stand for!
They are your strength,
So therefore, I will continue to fight this
LIVING WITH BLINDNESS!
LORD, please help me
Send me your HOLY SPIRIT...
© Flora Aguasa
'Prayer is the best medicine and GOD is the best doctor'. That is absolutely correct! Let the HOLY FATHER decide what's the best for us. Just surrender and offer everything to HIM! HE knows our needs. Praise the LORD!
As we worship YOU HOLY FATHER,
Satisfy our hearts with joy,
Fill our hearts with strength,
Gratify our hearts with deep love
Fill us with Your power
And, let serenity have a biggest place in us,
And take its place
As we kneel and bow our heads,
Let us feel YOUR presence LORD JESUS CHRIST.
Hear our prayers,
Listen to our pleas
Hear our cries,
Let us touch YOU.
Allow us to embrace YOU
And walk away with us.
WE WORSHIP YOU HOLY FATHER
Every day of our lives
From East to West,
From South to North,
From dawn to dark.
As we worship YOUR HOLY NAME,
Enkindle in us the fire of YOUR love,
Burning with peace and joy.
© Flora Aguasa
No other words to utter,
No perfect line to describe,
Just a massive THANK YOU, LORD JESUS
For the graces I have received,
For the unending love you made me feel throughout,
For continue healing me and make my body strong each day.
LORD, Your love is abundant and endless
How great are YOU LORD!
THANK YOU, LORD JESUS
For my beautiful, happy and complete family.
My inner happiness lies in YOU
No amount of money is needed,
Nor successful career is required,
Just a simple, happy, loving, peaceful and complete family
Is all I wished and prayed for.
THANK YOU, LORD JESUS for giving it to me!
Today, LORD JESUS,
I will not ask for anything else as
YOU have blessed me with so much,
Much more than I prayed for
And, much more than I deserved.
THANK YOU for the great surprises!
THANK YOU for the countless blessings!
THANK YOU for the gift of life!
© Flora Aguasa
:: Versions of the Cranky Old Man poem, also published as Crabbit Old Woman, Look Closer, Look Closer Nurse, Kate, Open Your Eyes, Too Soon Old, and What Do You See? Includes A Nurse's Reply poem...Full Story