The Art of Sitting - Quest for Peace

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Many under-appreciated skills are gained when you live the life of chronic illness.

My top ranking skills include: the ability to pronounce medical terms better than some doctors, I can set up the DVR and turn on Netflix blindfolded and most importantly - I have learned the Art of Sitting.

Yes, I am serious.

Days in and days out, months in and months out, I have spent a long time being forced to keep my butt glued to my bed or recliner. The times I wasn't in the bed or recliner I was in the wheelchair. I often fought this reality of mine. My mind and heart wanted a life my body could not provide.

The more I fought this truth, the more I would negatively impact my health and would end up right back where I began - sitting.

Result is - lots of sitting.

I have learned through many years to make peace with my disabled life - because I had no other choice. And sometimes, that is a wonderful gift in itself. While I spent days wishing I could jump up and dance a little mambo, I instead began to appreciate the art in my life. Yes, the art of sitting.

What if we could find happiness wherever we sit?

Even from the doctors office, the hospital, our bedroom?

Is joy external?

Or could we truly be irrevocably happy just staring at a wall?

I am going to make the bold statement and say yes, we can. (side note: depression and anxiety can often be the cause of an imbalance in our brain chemistry or hormones. When you have this, you can't simply 'think yourself happy'. Though, I strongly believe that with the following steps you can help your body and mind in the right direction)

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The Art of Sitting is taking away all distractions. It is taking time to soak in a moment with an open heart and mind. No judgment. The Art of sitting is mindful meditation. With regular meditation, research has shown we can lower blood pressure, boost immune system and even help reach happiness. Our chronically ill bodies often chain us to a bed or room without our consent. It is hard to settle in and see the beauty in a moment when you are forced to be there. Longing for the freedom. Being locked inside your head can drive you mad, sitting with the demons in the recesses of your mind. So trapped you can't find intention or open your heart. It takes a strong mind to face those demons and let the emotions out. But the only way to overcome any negative emotion is through it. I will go over how to face and release your pain, fears and anger in another article. For now, know it is important to let yourself cry or scream when you need to. When you are honest with your feelings, you will be ready to open your heart completely to a moment.

When you are stuck somewhere, it can actually be the most freeing- you are liberated. There's nothing you can do, so settle in and enjoy the moment.

This art is an intimate, open interaction between you and that moment.

Be nowhere but this room. One place, un-distracted, the world lights up. Begin to take things less seriously and simply... be. With enough practice and repetition, this art feels the same as being in love.

Mind opens, spirit soars and your soul breathes a sigh of relief. In one spot, suddenly I am the world. My energy is part of the whole system, larger than me...

Now, Let's Make Some Art

Sit somewhere without distractions and let's give it a try.

Sit or lay in a comfortable position.

Clear your mind and still your emotions.

Close your eyes.

Take long, deep breaths. Deep, into your belly, breaths. In through your nose for 5 seconds and exhale out of your mouth for 5 seconds.

Everytime your mind gets distracted, gently go back to focusing on your breathing. Do not be irritated with yourself for not staying focused. It is perfectly natural to get distracted and it is okay. Just continue to break your focus back on your breathing.

Now, continue your breaths but slowly mentally focus on each part of your body. Start at the top of your head and as you slowly scan down your body let that part of your body relax and melt away tension. What is your favorite color? I want you to imagine a paint in that color being poured on your head. It will slowly coat you from head to toe. And as it slowly coats your body, your muscles and mind will let go of tension and any emotion.

You are simply here right now.

Continue your breathing.

Gently take note of every sound around you. Do not judge it. Just take a second hearing every sound around you. Including the sound of your breaths slowly filling your lungs to capacity and then the strong exhale leaving your lips.

Focus on your breathing only again.

Now gently turn your attention to the feeling of gravity hugging your body and gently holding you to the earth.

Focus on your breathing only again.

Continue this until you feel ready.

When you are ready, open your eyes for a couple seconds. Continue your breathing.

Close your eyes for a couple seconds. Continue your breathing.

Open your eyes for about half a minute. Continue your breathing.

Close your eyes for about half a minute. Continue your breathing.

Now, open your eyes again and keep them open. And, you guessed it- continue your breathing.

Without moving your body, take in everything around you. Focus on your breathing, but take in the world around you right now without any judgment.

Take in everything as it simply is.

Here is My Latest Moment Using The Art of Sitting

I sit in this chair and it envelopes me like a hug. It's like gravity and this chair decided to show me the world loves me with this gentle hug.

My body has grown weary and the vibrations in my left foot tell me it is time for me to rest for at least a moment. I resist being confined to this spot until a small movement catches my eye. The shadows are dancing on my wall. Though I can't see the tree outside, I know that gentle swaying on my wall is the tree branches and the happy twinkling is the leaves fluttering in the wind. Among the shadows on the wall, I can see every memory and every moment I have experienced. I involuntarily inhale deep and long, my mind relinquishing control and settling into this moment. I let my muscles relax one at a time from the tip of my head and slowly down my body... like warm water slowly washing down and through me.

I begin to hear the clicking from the ice machine, the soft hum of the refrigerator, the gentle tick of the clock on the wall. I feel the cool air on my skin, the pressure of the chair beneath me, the tingling in my heart and belly. I can feel my body alive. My nerves don't always work properly, but nonetheless, I can feel my body humming like the refrigerator. My nerves fire when they shouldn't, I feel like I have the flu more often than not and my immune system can't get enough of me in the worst of way.

But, right here, in this moment, I realize I am alive. And from my recliner chair I watch life play out before me in the most exquisite ballet.

About the Author

Caylee Shea is a columnist for Disabled World, Caylee raises awareness for people with chronic illness and disabilities. Her purpose is to bring us all together- all of us delightful weirdos and proud gimps! Whatever your level of disability - especially if it is a hidden disability - life can be very lonely. Through her hardships, Caylee has learned to never give up and to enjoy the little things in life.

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