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Speed Dating for Meeting Women and Men

  • Synopsis: Published: 2009-02-12 (Revised/Updated 2015-01-23) - For many guys online speed dating has become a valuable resource for meeting interesting and attractive women. For further information pertaining to this article contact: Ian Langtree at Disabled World.

Main Document

Quote: "During your online speed dating session, be sure to ask women questions that are interesting and allows them reveal more about their personality."

If you have never heard of online speed dating, it works like regular speed dating. Basically, you login into the site during a specific time and spend about 8 minutes or so chatting with a female. Then you move on and start talking to a different woman. Now online speed dating differs from offline speed dating because it allows people a second chance at making contact.

I've got a confession to make.

I often use online speed dating sites to meet women.

Sounds pathetic right

Well actually it isn't...

For many guys, online speed dating has become a valuable resource for meeting interesting and attractive women.

So how does online speed dating work

If you have never heard of online speed dating, it works like regular speed dating. Basically, you login into the site during a specific time and spend about 8 minutes or so chatting with a female. Then you move on and start talking to a different woman.

Now online speed dating differs from offline speed dating because it allows people a second chance at making contact. Typically after an online speed dating session has finished, the participants submit a list of the people they like. So if you hit it off with a woman, and she selects you as well, then you're given each other's contact information.

What's great about online speed dating is you get a second chance even if your initial conversation didn't go well. Since this is an online dating service, everybody has a profile which people can visit. So even if an attractive woman doesn't select you right away, you can still initiate contact through their messaging service.

Now that I've covered the basics of online speed dating, let me talk about a few ways you can make yourself stand out from the other guys who use this service.

1- Create a great profile

  • In order to stand out from the crowd, you have to create a profile that is enticing. Here are some ways that you can create a profile which women will love:
  • Make your life seem fun and exciting. Women are attracted to guys who lead interesting lives.
  • Have a professional picture taken of yourself and use that as your primary photo
  • Don't disclose too much information. Instead be a little bit mysterious about yourself.
  • Use humor in your profile, but don't come across as goofy or self-deprecating.

2- Ask interesting questions and use humor

During your online speed dating session, be sure to ask women questions that are interesting and allows them reveal more about their personality. Your goal during these sessions is to stand out, so don't be afraid to do something different.

In other words, avoid boring her to tears by asking about her job. Instead discuss topics in which she has a strong positive emotional attachment.

For instance, you could ask her about her dreams, or favorite hobbies. The more you can make a connection to something she loves, the more she'll find you attractive.

3- Know what women are looking for

Women are strange creatures!

Often they'll say they want one thing and then turn around do the exact opposite.

For instance, they often talk about wanting a "nice guy", but they'll usually ditch the nice guy for the "bad boy".

Basically women want a lot of things in their lives. They want excitement, fun, security, adventure, etc. By knowing what women want, you can show how you'll fit into their ideal candidate for that role.

The key to successful online speed dating is to make an incredible first impression and leave them wanting for more. If you can fulfill the expectations of what women are looking for then it'll be much easier to go on dates with interesting women.

The Pros and Cons of Speed Dating

So you've decided it's time to get out there and meet new people to date. You look at your options beyond online dating and stumble upon a speed dating event in your area that looks interesting. What do you need to consider before you decide to take advantage of this opportunity? Is this really the right venue for you to meet someone

Let me give you a bit of a set up: Most speed dating organizations organize the event by age groups, interests, even religions. You arrive at a bar, restaurant or community center with about 2 dozen other singles - half women and half men. You sign in and are given a number and a card for taking notes about the people you meet.

Pairs are assigned and you find the person for which you will begin with. Different organizations have different time limits. The time to spend together can range from 2 minutes to 10 minutes. After the first round, you move onto subsequent rounds with a new partner. If you are interested in someone, you put their number on the card.

By the end, if both people like each other and put each other's numbers down on the card submitted to the organizers, then they receive each other's contact information so they can meet outside the event. However, if one person puts down an individual and that person doesn't reciprocate, then no contact information is given out.

Below are some Pros and Cons to consider so you will be aware of what you may be facing in this kind of dating prospect venue.

Cons of Speed Dating:

  • How you decide to meet someone is based on superficial stuff - it's only natural to judge someone on looks and first impressions. You may be turned off right away and then not make any effort reach deeper to get to know someone's inner soul.
  • If you know that you have no interest in someone, you still have to spend the rest of the time talking to him or her. This can be torturous - especially if your partner has no conversational skills. Minutes can seem like hours!
  • You have to subject yourself to rejection. What if you like someone and they don't like you backSpeed dating is not for the thin-skinned person. Your inner critic will have a field day if no one picks you.
  • There may be a cute guy across the room (okay, we can't help being superficial!) and you are never paired up with him because of time constraints. You may never get a chance to meet him. It seems like the stars are conspiring against you and there was a major opportunity lost.
  • No connections were made; you feel like the evening was a waste of time and wish that you stayed home that night watching Gray's Anatomy!

Yes, speed dating can be a disappointment ... but the good news is that there have been successful meetings at these events. I know a married couple who met this way. I also have had clients meet nice people to date. Here is the positive side of speed dating.

Pros of Speed Dating:

  • You get to meet at least a half dozen people who are inclined to give you their undivided attention for the time allotted.
  • If you sit back and relax, you can get a sense of someone, their demeanor and their essence - whether it's positive or negative. This is when it's helpful to know how to read body language.
  • You know the majority of people are serious about meeting someone to date. Why else would someone subject themselves to this
  • You can see if you can carry a conversation with someone. You'll find out if there are interests in common. You may not meet the love of your life, but you could find a person who could be a life long friend.
  • You may actually meet someone you like that you would consider dating. Now you're ahead of where you were when you walked in the door!

To make the most out of your speed dating experience, arrive armed with a few tricks in your back pocket. As a conversation starter, have some generic questions to ask such as about a person's hobbies, hometown or the type of music they like. Tell a funny story about yourself. Have a glass of water or a soft drink to take a sip from during a pregnant pause. Try to make eye contact and SMILE! When it's time to "rate your date", give a thumbs up to anyone you're on the fence with - speed dating may make a person come across as intimidated or reserved, so consider giving them a second chance if they like you and you think there may be something worth exploring.

Go into speed dating with the spirit of adventure, and leave your expectations at the door. You may just be pleasantly surprised! If you don't have a successful experience, you can cross this off your list, go back to online dating or look into the many other ways you can meet people to date.

If you want more suggestions, try these Local Dating Services for Women and Men.

Related Information:

  1. Difference Between How Women and Men Choose Partners - Concordia University - (May 01, 2014)
    https://www.disabled-world.com/communication/disabled-dating/advice/partners.php
  2. Seniors Reveal Secrets to Enduring Love - Watermark Retirement Communities, Inc. - (Jan 31, 2011)
    https://www.disabled-world.com/communication/disabled-dating/enduring-love.php
  3. Finding the Love of Your Life - Arielle Ford - (Jan 24, 2011)
    https://www.disabled-world.com/communication/disabled-dating/love.php


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